from
The ContendA who wears one red SuspendA
WORKING NINE TO FIVE
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4/13/97 - Look for a NEW SuspendA'd Sentences every Sunday
THE LONGEST DAY CONTINUES
NEIGH, NEIGH!...YOU SAY
or A HORSE OF A DIFFERENT COLOR.
To read previous SuspendA'd Sentences click any of the dates below
3/9/97,
3/16/97,
3/20/97
3/23/97
3/30/97
4/6/97
I got back to the office just as the bell sounded
for the next round. After listening to D'Manager
describe all the marvelous dishes available at
D'Corner Coffee Shoppe (See 4/6/97),
I wuz so hungry
I could eat a horse. I vowed I wuz going to sit down by
the flickering light of the torch I brought back from
Lady Char's Knights of the Ring (See 3/20/97),
open my
Rocky lunch box and devour the peanut butter and spam sandwich -
but!!!! Something wuzn't right in here.
When I ran into the office I almost knocked myself out
(This has unfortunately happened to me many times before.)
I put my foot down and - WHOOSH!!!! - slid all the way across
the room - banging into the shelves at the far end, kicking up
tons of Fairy Dust from the Spirit Sticks stored on a shelf and
causing a large, dusty album stored on one of the top shelves
out of easy reach, to fall to the floor with a resounding thud.
In the shock of the moment, during my inglorious, comedic
pratfall I thought I heard what sounded like a mocking horse laugh.
"Probably just my imagination", I thought as I lay on the floor.
(I seem to have this unescapable history of strange,
embarrassing, laughable entrances
(See 3/23/97) that befall me).
I Fairy Dusted myself off and inspected the bottom of my shoe
by the dim light expecting to discover a banana peel remnant.
There wuz, however not banana peel but a wad of of something
warm, gummy, dark brown in color and giving off a foul odor
that wuz vaguely reminiscent of horse manure.
ARGHHHH!!!! IT WUZ HORSE MANURE!!!!
Right there and then I realized I wuz not alone in the office.
My good cauliflower ear picked up the sound of breathing -
or should I say snorting, whinnying and neighing. I quickly
looked around the tiny office and over in the corner I saw THEM!!
A herd of wild mustangs - calmly chomping away at the pile of
sugar coated Spirit Cheers lying on the bottom shelf -
teeth bared, horse laughing among themselves as they chewed.
I gently lifted the tail, a waft of foul air and the sound of
a bronx cheer greeting me as I did. I tried not to breathe
as I read the note, which said the following:
"Dear SuspendA,
Hi!..We belong to Amber, the newest member of The Site Fights Family.
We're from her new Satellite Ring "The Wild Mustangs".
We're just a bunch of wild and crazy Mustang type of horses.
Our boss, Amber wuz invited to play a round of miniature golf
with Dman as they discussed promoting our new addition to the fights".
(Hmmmmm!Maybe I'll get an invitation to play with Dman someday....
Hey!!...It's still only my first day here...I'll just wait and see.)
The note went on to say "Amber asked if you would
please entertain us
til she finishes her match.
She also says, Thanks for sharing your stall
and she remains Forever Amber.(I just couldn't resist that one!)
How the heck do you entertain horses?
Play games like 'Pin the Tail on the Mustang'?....
tell them Horse jokes?....Try some Stable humor?...
Have them run a 6 legged potato sack race ?...
Read a racy novel?...Read Joyce Carol Oates?...
Sow wild Oats with them?...just horse around, in general?...
Fool them into thinking they're a Merry-Go-Round and
let them run circles around the office until Amber gets back?
(I had the feeling I wuz heading for the Last Roundup).
I carefully walked back to my desk, holding my nose,
while trying to avoid the piles of droppings, now sparkling
with Fairy Dust and glimmering playfully in the torchlight.
A half step from the desk, I stubbed my toe on the dusty album
that had fallen off the shelf when I banged into it earlier,
causing me to fall headfirst into a steaming pile of horse doo!
I wuz covered with it...What an embarrassment!
I turned a bright
Horse Radish, reddish, Amber color.
Amber's Mustangs were rolling on
the floor,
hysterically neighing and horse laughing themselves silly.
(Well, at least I figured out how to entertain them).
Could I go out in the hallway and face my fellow workers
when the gong sounded the end of this round?
Is there anything here in the office I could use to clean myself off?
Could I somehow figure out how to disguise myself
and the pungent aroma surrounding my entire being?
Would my best friend tell my secret to the world?
What wuz the album that I tripped on and what does it contain?
The gong sounded ending Round 5...
Tune in next week to find the answers.
Be sure to visit "Amber's Wild Mustangs"
Check out and vote for her ContendAs -
just be careful where you step.
DRose's Rumble Review for The lighter side of the Site Fights.
DMaestro's The Knockout brings the many sides of
the Site Fights and it's fighters to lite!
Cruise the rest of the Site Fights rings also.
I hope you enjoy yourselves as much as I do.
Please mail your feedback to DSuspendA at
"SuspendA'd Sentences"
and come back often.
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head on over to
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