Who's Dman - Issue 12b: Interview With DContendA

(Editor's note... although the original Who's Dman had DContendA and DContendA's interview on the same page, I've broken it up for easier readabilty -- Duncan)

Thanks so much Skye. Now try to dry your eyes and let gear up for golf. I had to interview my partner to see what kind of plan we could come up with. I had to brush my hair out of my eyes to look down the fareway. Putter in hand and listening to the snapping of suspendas behind me. After much distraction, practice was called off. I got out my pencil and sat down with Dcontenda with one Red Suspenda.

	DUncle	When did you become involved with the Site Fights?
	DContendA	I weighed in last January and started my career as a beggar for votes in the opening round.
	DUncle	How were you discovered?
	DContendA	Cheryl (aka DWombat) a web friend from Australia asked me to go a place named "The Site Fights" to vote for her and be a part of her cheering section in her "bouts" to become a site champion in the 'Main Event'. I went and .....BOOM!....next thing I knew all my clothes haver been removed and I'm given an oversized pair of boxing shorts which I put on backwards and could only be held up by this pair of Red SuspendAs. My hands were laced and encased in a pair of boxing gloves which I have never taken off to this day. (It's not easy typing my column with them on, you know.) So my "EMPTY TRASH TALK' SITE wuz launched on a career up the fight ladder until Lady Char knocked me out in The Warzone on her journey to the Championship. (I coulda been a ContendA, ya know!)
	DUncle	Has anyone actually solved one of your conundrums?
	DContendA	Your question is a real Conundrum. Can I have some hints?...(Actually the answer is yes. The only way I find out the answers is by the answers I receive.)
	DUncle	Where do you find the inspiration for your writtings?
	DContendA	The inspriation for my writtings comes form Dman. His tpying style is a gudie that I tyr to follwo.
	DUncle	How has your readership grown since you first started?
	DContendA	They've grown about a year and probably celebrated a birthday by now.
	DUncle	In your articles you appear to talk to yourself, should I be concerned?
	DContendA	I never noticed. (Hey, SuspendA, How in the heck did he come up with that one?)
	DUncle	What is your handicap?
	DContendA	FORE?...Besides always getting my SuspendA caught on something and embarrassing myself?... Never having played Miniature Golf before?... Besides never being able to handicap the horses?...(Stop that! You'll make him nervous and throw his game off!)
	DUncle	Should we use a cart, or shall we walk the course?
	DContendA	A Cart. I'll bring one over from my Local Supermarket.
	DUncle	How are we going to win this golf game against Dman and Nick?
	DContendA	I have some secret weapons inside my baggy golf trousers. I'll hide an encoded message to you as to what they are in my next column. Do you have the Little Orphan Annie Secret Decoder Ring?
	DUncle	In your mind, Who's Dman?
	DContendA	There is no Dman in my mind. Actually there's nothing in my mind. I've been told that a mind is a terrible thing to......

z=p, a=r, hmmm.. am I using this thing right. Oh, sorry, you're back. Well, looks like the game is gearing up. I've got my putter polished and my hair pulled back. Look out Nick, Look out Dman, The typing Duo is on it's way...WOO~HOO....

In the next issue, Who's Dman? interviews Kenny from the Cherubs...

Click here for an index of the archive, or go on to issue thirteen.

Who's Dman is brought to you by DUncle from Button Central And The Site Fights.

(This page written sometime in 1998 by DUncle. Layout updated January 2001, by Duncan. Enjoy!)